Waiting

I know I have said that I am waiting before. That seems to be the natural state of affairs in international adoption. And I have really tried to be true to "God's timing is PERFECT" This Sunday in church our pastor was teaching on just that, God's perfect timing. We may question, get angry, get sad, get impatient, but God's timing IS perfect because He is perfect and He loves us. Over and over again in the bible we can now see "ohhhh that is why God's people had to wait, so that and that could happen first ..." Same thing in our lives.
So we are on week 6 waiting for our LOA (letter of acceptance) from China. Nothing can proceed in as far as paperwork and/or traveling without the LOA. So yes we are waiting. I just really wanted to give you all an update.
Oh yeah...this is one more thing I have been waiting for....

Krispy Kreme Valentines donuts...they are back and well worth the wait...like so many other things in life.

Chinese New Year Celebrations

What a fun busy weekend! We had our adoption playgroup here yesterday, Chinese New Year Celebration today and violin recital this afternoon. Good night sleep tonight!

Year of the Dragon

For the next two weeks or so there will be tons of celebrating in China. Families reunite after many months of seperation, due to working away from home towns. Homes are swept clean of the past and lots of food is shared by all. I am sure that the celebrations have changed through the years, just as China has changed so quickly. I am sure the older generations try to hold on to traditional customs and the younger generation tries to fit into the history of China and the China of today. If you have ever traveled to China the contrast between young and old is remarkable. Literally there may be an older man carrying his goods on a wagon or on his back on a bike and next to him a zooming Porche whizzes by. The gap between rich and poor is huge.
The one child policy for the past 30 years or so has, I would assume changed family celebrations as well. No longer are there tons of grandchildren running around their grandparents feet, listening to stories of the good ole days. So many fewer children to pass on the stories of their ancestors. Wonder what the older generations think. Is it good or bad to them?

Kisses from Kate

If you look on my blog list , I added a new one that you may like to read. It is written by a young Christian woman who is her early 20s. She is serving God by living in Uganda and becoming a mother to 13 orphans. Check out her blog "the journey" and her book "Kisses from Kate "

Race in our Country. Race in our home.

My DH (dear husband) drove my DS (dear son) to college this weekend. He changed colleges so his housing situation has changed. The college he is now attending is in the mountains of NC. I would say the majority of the students are white, with of course most minorities represented in some number. DS and DH checked in a went up to the new room. DS was fortunate to get housing mid year, on campus housing is at a premium at this college. They called to let me know that the room was great, suite style, kitchen, living room, shared bathroom. The new room mate is an upper classmen, the space opened up because his room mate had graduated in December. DS told me where his room mate is from, he seems nice, was very welcoming all good stuff! Some where in the conversation DS or DH told me that his new room mate is black. Honestly, I don't even know what part of the conversation this bit of information came up. No big deal to DS. His two best friends growing up are black, as far as skin color my DS gets darker in the summer than his two friends. When he was a little boy my DS thought he was the "dark" one in the group. But I did begin to ponder some things about my world. I am not going to solve our countries race issues but I began to ponder my world, my family. DS's new room is suite style meaning a couple of rooms share the common area (kitchen, living room).If the other students were also black, and my son was now the minority, I wonder how he would feel. Something to think about, huh? Just a thought?
When I lived in CA, newly married early 20's one of my best friends was black. We never really talked about race, she was my friend. We had more in common than not in coomon(different skin color). We were about the same age, newly married, from NY, starting our careers , no kids new to CA. So we were friends! When we moved to our 2nd home in NC, God placed a great new friend as my "side neighbor" . Her boys were about the same age as my son, our husbands became friends, we shared lots of great times. When they moved lots of tears flowed for weeks. Did I mention she was black. I think back at our relationships and I wonder what was it like for them, they were definitely the minority in the world we shared. Was it OK for them? I had more "race related " conversations with my friend from NC, most likely because we were older and we were raising kids. Some were comical, such as my son thinking HE was the dark one. When all of our kids were learning about slavery together in school, my younger daughter starting having nightmares that they were going to take her brother away. They were all so young and innocent, just making observations based on literally the shades of skin. But really I wonder now, was it OK for my friends, I hope so. I love them like sisters. Now I am raising two (soon to be three) Asian-American girls. In our house they are not so much a minority. But in our community they are. Is that OK? When they go to high school or college will they seek out the friends that look like them. Will they make a college choice based on ethic make up? Years ago there was a study done in schools that study race in schools. They looked at the choices students made in seat choices in the cafeteria, Even after years of intergration, most kids chose to sit with kids of their own race. I think sadly, it is still like that in a lot of places. Not just schools-churches, schools and the workplace.
Even in writing this should I black as a description and change it to African- American? Even though my friend from CA is from Barbados should our skin color, country of origin define us?
I read books about IA-international adoption. They say it is important for our IA kids to feel OK in the "skin" and heritage. So I try to educate them in their birth countries history/culture. We go to a weekly play group that all the children are adopted from Asia. So really most of their friends do in fact look like them. Who are they though -are they Americans, Chinese, Br----ns, Christians, North Carolinians, etc. ? Who are any of us? How do you identify yourself? How do others identify you? What do you check in those little boxes at the doctors office, work or school applications? Why do we still have those boxes?
See, I told you I was not going to solve the world's race issues. I was just pondering...

2011 reflections

If I wrote a post last New years Day I don't think I would have imagined that on New Years Day 2012, we would have completed paper work and be waiting for Mia to come home. I remember the first Sunday of 2011, I sat in church staring at a little girls face that looked like my girls at home yet she did not have a forever home. She was an orphan girl that had been abandoned once again. And so I felt that God was calling me, leading me to pray for this sweet, sad girl whose face stared at me through my phone. I prayed each Sunday and often throughout the week that her forever family would come and hold her close, wipe her tears and give reasons to laugh. I started to talk about her to Greg, then my kids then my mom. Asking them to also pray for her. My mom, being my "heart caretaker" because of her being a wonderful mother, took on the role of uh oh, what are you exactly asking me to pray for. I assured her I wanted her to pray that God would reveal her forever family. Through months of prayer and many doors that God had to open we have been chosen, blessed to be her forever family and so this began the first Sunday of 2011. And so now begins 2012. A year in which we will travel once again to China to be united with another daughter. A year when our first daughter will graduate college. A year that our next daughter may choose her college. A year when two little ones will continue to school at home learning together. The ABCs, and the 123s. But as exciting as all these plans may sound I know only God really knows what 2012 will hold for each of us.Isn't that reassuring! My prayer for 2012 is that our family will learn to rely more fully on God, and less on the world.

Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

I have it. I will confess. Not to cleaning. Not hoarding. Not gambling. Not shopping. It is checking my email for an update from China or our adoption agency. The estimated time to wait for our LOA (Letter of Acceptance) from China is now 2-4 months. So why do I check my emails several times a day, just in case it is there?? The addiction is horrible now that iphones literally make all info or lack there of right at my finger tips. Wonder if there are meetings I need to go to? Hello my name is Jo

dy and I am addicted to checking my email for adoption updates. Who will be my sponsor out there?

Waiting

So excited to be DTC (documents to China), officially! The happy dance was short lived.
I received an email from our adoption agency informing the new DTC families that the wait from DTC to travel is now estimated at 5-9 months. I was and still am so sad. So many emotions within just a few hours, but that is adoption. I should know the emotional drill by now.
But there is such a beautiful God that prepares us for the lows too. The past few weeks at church our pastor has been teaching us about what was going on before the birth of Jesus (it is now less than a week before Christmas) basically in the lives of Mary and her cousin Elizabeth, John the Baptist's mother. Just points that are so clear to me this morning. Elizabeth had to wait over 50 years for a child that she most likely had prayed for each and everyday until the hope was gone. She was now most likely in her 80s, well past her child bearing years. She was gossiped about and even perhaps shunned because in those days you were considered to have done something wrong since you could not conceive a child. Perhaps she had some deep dark hidden sin so God was punishing her. Poor Elizabeth. Until, ALL IN GOD'S TIMING Elizabeth did conceive-John. John, cousin to Jesus and the one who would tell 1000's about Jesus. John was literally the one the God chose to prepare people for Jesus, and he was the one Elizabeth was to deliver!!
13 But the angel said to him: “Do not be afraid, Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John. 14 He will be a joy and delight to you, and many will rejoice because of his birth, 15 for he will be great in the sight of the Lord. He is never to take wine or other fermented drink, and he will be filled with the Holy Spirit even before he is born. 16 He will bring back many of the people of Israel to the Lord their God. 17 And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous—to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.”
So yes, I am sad that our family and Mia may have to wait a few extra months to be united BUT I do have the hope, trust and love of God that I know he has great plans for each of us.
And honestly after writing this, in this short time. I am not nearly as sad as I was. I am excited to see the plans that God has for me. Thank you, God for making this so much clearer today than it was last night.

Merry Christmas by Third Day

There's a little girl trembling on a cold December morn
Crying for momma's arms
At an orphanage just outside a little China town
There the forgotten are

But half a world away I hang the stockings by the fire
And dream about the day when I can finally call you mine

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

As I hang the tinsel on the tree and watch the twinkling lights
I'm warmed by the fire's glow
Outside the children tumble in a wonderland of white,
Make angels in the snow

But half a world away you try your best to fight the tears
And hope that heaven's angels come to carry you here

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

Christmas is a time to celebrate the holy child
And we celebrate his perfect gift of love
He came to earth to give his life
And prepare a place for us
So we could have a home with him above

It's Christmas time again and now you're home
Your family is here so you will never be alone
So tonight before you go to sleep, I'll hold you in my arms
And I'll tell you from my heart, and I'll you from my heart
I wish you Merry Christmas

Dossier to China-DTC

Our agency called tonight. I was expecting an email confirmation that our dossier had been sent to China sometime this afternoon. When the caller ID on my cell said it was our agency, I have to admit that in the split second of looking at my phone and actually answering, I began to sweat. My mind went to , "oh my there must be a problem if they are calling". We have had a series of unusual delays in the paperwork so my mind went right to "uh oh" But nope, our dossier consultant, who has been great through the entire process, was just calling me to say that Fedex had just picked up our dossier. What a sweet thing for her to do!
Our dossier (paperwork) should arrive in China on December 19th. Can't imagine how international adoption was conducted prior to email, and Fedex. Literally a slow boat to China? Now it is China's turn to sift through all of our documents. Hopefully they can do it faster than the US did it this time around.
Happy dance tonight!